I know exactly what u mean - this is my first car on PCP also and at the end of 5yrs I will still owe £8k... Like you I have always owned my motors and so it's a real shock to the system having to sign up like that.
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Subaru Impreza WRX STi Prodrive Type UK 2002: 
"Tinkered With!"
Maintained and Modified by Super Jules 
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RM Performance http://www.rmperformance.co.uk
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